I really, really, really, really, really dislike being very much attracted to someone, but also being pretty sure that they are not someone I would marry. It makes the attraction worthless and in the way.
It's even worse when it happens to be someone I want to be friends with. At least it's not mutual... that would get complicated.
I've asked God many times in the past if He would allow me to only "like" the guy I'm gonna marry. Make things easier, right? I guess He's not all about that. I know He's protected me from so much, but I'm still trying to figure out these hormonal things.... How long have I had them? Haha... it feels pathetic, though I have been told it's normal. I hope to create a new normal.
Even though I'm having a hard time trying to figure things out, I'm not too worried about it. I want to protect my heart, so I'm giving it to God. If He allows someone to have a part of it as well then it must be okay. I just have to remember everyday to give to God. I seem to take it back by the evening. I'm not much for truly giving up control. But it is evening now and I'll give this heart back to Him. I think He's already holding it, but just to make sure I'll give it again.
Attractions come and go. It annoys me.
Jesus never loses His awesomeness. That never annoys me.
I'm glad something doesn't. ;)
... not just writing to her own beat, but that of the Master.
3 comments:
Preach it girl.
Hey Bethany.. Long time no speak. You know... I have dealt with these type things. And I have grown out of them.
Just some thoughts on how to overcome what you're feeling. I think God gives us feelings for a reason, to lead us to where we need to be. Ultimately, closer to HIM, but, since you feel stuck... why not ask yourself, ''What about this person am I attracted to? '' or what are you unattracted to (turned off by)... It's ok to be attracted to people, as it is also ok to dislike certain things about people.. those are indicators of how you feel.
Why not take another look at your goals and how you expect to get to where you want to be??
If you want to find someone to spend your life with you have to figure out what kind and type of person that will be, what type of person you will be, and then pray to God about it!!
He will give us our heart's desires!!
That is His heart for us!
Now, you are beautiful, and artistic and yet, precious and vulnerable. You need to definitely proceed with caution..since you have so many feelings and thoughts to figure out. Since time proves all things make sure you go very slow getting to know when you meet someone special.
I used to read from a Christian based relationship webzine all the time and it had much information and advice that I really appreciated and that webzine is called Boundless.
I recommend you browsing that and also I totally understand the apprehension and the desires of our minds and will and flesh and emotion and I know it is sometimes impossible to just let go of all the feelings ... but... somehow if you can just ''Trust Him'' and be yourself (meaning, be complete without a man.....a husband) when the LORD brings the man he has for you into your life, you will then have all the reason to be excited!!!
Just try to enjoy where your at, what your doing and who your with. You've always paid attention to my desperate needs and responded with thoughfulness and love. I will be praying for your heart's peace and confidence in Him who is Holy and Perfect! Who loves you perfectly!
Take care of yourself and write me via email or FB if you want to...
Love,
AshleighBritt
P.S. I just remembered that I had to remind you that no one is perfect! When you find the love of your life, you will see... that nobody is perfect. We all need Jesus.... and yet.. God's people are precious. You will have to be prepared to love someone who is so close to you, and imperfect just like you. Not saying this to be false, but true.
everything leads to love
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